there's no such thing as a dumb question

how much of you should i use during one scrubbing?

enough to cover and scrub your whole body. i like to be all over you. 

how often should i use you?

i recommend using me 1-3 times per week. any more than that and i might wear you out ;)

what are your ingredients?

finely ground robusta coffee (coffea), brown sugar (sucrose), sweet almond oil (prunus dulcis), coconut oil (cocos nucifero), avocado oil (persea americano), sea salt (sodium chloride), vitamin e (tocopherol), cinnamon (cinnamomum verum), and orange essential oil (citrus sinensis). click here to learn about the importance of each and every ingredient that makes me who i am.

can i use you on my face?

yes. oh yes. i love being all over your face. but be gentle and try not to get me in your eyes.

will you stain my skin? 

no, but i will leave your skin soft, supple, smooth, and glowing.

will you stain my bathroom?

no, and i easily wash away with water. 

how did you come up with your name?

because relationship rule #1 is honesty, and you #getdirtyaf when we get together  

what if i have more questions? what should i do?

ask me anything at